Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
