I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
