Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Randomize
