I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize