I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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