NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
