please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
