I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
