Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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