I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
