I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
