WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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