Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
