WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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