dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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