My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize