Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize