Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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