and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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