I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
