so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
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