question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
