i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
