We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
