Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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