is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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