he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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