Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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