Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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