well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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