Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
