Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
