She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
