Pregnant stripper...not hot.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
