i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Randomize
