I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
