um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Quick, to the slutcave!
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
