he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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