Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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