This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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