You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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