I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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