Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
What a dumb baby whore.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
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