Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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