His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
what day is it and did you see me today?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I believe in your delicious
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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