Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
