we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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