the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
