A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
