We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
