he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
It's official drugs can't kill me
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
