ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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