When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
