I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
