This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
